While some prefer a quietude,

A chess and checkers attitude,

I prefer a good ol’ tiger hunt,

Instead of banters light and pleasant,

Of latest fashions and lunch of pheasant,

I travel India to kill—-and that is blunt,

I have no time for a leisure tea or a leisure life lived leisurely,

So off to the jungles of Asia I do go,

Though hunting big cats tops the list,

A nasty pig sticking I’ve rarely missed,

And a shot at a rhino or a croc I’ll often throw,

 

Yes once I was a proper aristocrat,

Wearing a lounge coat or a suit, cane, and top hat,

But soon that life became too boring,

For this old bird who’d rather go soaring,

I’m just a world class man of the wilds—-and that is that,

Just a onetime and former proper aristocrat!

 

You see, a Maharaja friend of mine,

Invited me to spend some time,

High atop his favorite elephant’s back,

So instead of sitting around in Surrey,

I hopped a boat and left all worry,

To those torn between a bauble and a knickknack,

In their fancy dress and fancy hats,

With their fancy pampered pussy cats,

They dare to dabble in discussions much too droll,

And while I’m out risking life and limb,

They’re sitting in fan cooled rooms lit dim,

Slowly snacking on kippered salmon served up whole,

 

Yes once I was a proper aristocrat,

Wearing a lounge coat or a suit, cane, and top hat,

But soon that life became too boring,

For this old bird who’d rather go soaring,

I’m just a world class man of the wilds—-and that is that,

Just a onetime and former proper aristocrat!

 

To conclude,

So to those who prefer the safe idle comforts of the parlor,

And not being out here on the trail of a growler or snarler,

Go ahead and shout “Muggins” in a card game or such,

While I hold the wonders of adventure in my clutch,

With gratitude—-it’s the wilds, or the jungles, or the brush, or the thickets for me,

With platitude—-after champagne and caviar, enjoy your cribbage my dear friends and fam-i-ly!

 

Yes once I was a proper aristocrat,

Wearing a lounge coat or a suit, cane, and top hat,

But soon that life became too boring,

For this old bird who’d rather go soaring,

I’m just a world class man of the wilds—-and that is that,

I’m Just a onetime and former proper aristocrat,

Just a onetime and former proper aristocrat!

 

 

by John Patrick Seekamp 2016