Young bird cries for worm,
Baby in crib cries for milk,
Sun hides in dark cloud.
by John Patrick Seekamp 2015
YOUNG BIRD, BABY, SUN
26 Monday Oct 2015
Category Archives: Humor
WIG, TOUPEE, and JACK FROST
26 Monday Oct 2015
Posted in Creative writing, Fiction, Haikus, Humor, Observations, Poems, Writings
Tags
Haiku, Hats, Jack Frost, Toupee, Wigs
Woman removes wig,
Man removes hat and toupee,
Jack Frost removes warmth.
by John Patrick Seekamp 2015
OLD MOVIE, OLD SONG, OLD TV SHOW
26 Monday Oct 2015
JILL, JACK, and HILL
25 Sunday Oct 2015
Posted in Creative writing, Fiction, Haikus, Humor, Observations, Poems, Writings
BOY, GIRL, and……
25 Sunday Oct 2015
Posted in Creative writing, Fiction, Haikus, Humor, Observations, Poems, Writings
CONFUSED US SAYS:
25 Sunday Oct 2015
Tags
Shrimp only prawn in game of life!
by John Patrick Seekamp 2015
OLD FROG, YOUNG FROG, TADPOLE
25 Sunday Oct 2015
SOAP IN EYES, KNOCK AT DOOR, OH NO!
25 Sunday Oct 2015
Posted in Creative writing, Fiction, Haikus, Humor, Observations, Poems, Writings
Soap in Geisha’s eyes,
Knock at door; cannot see,
Oh, no kimono!
by John Patrick Seekamp 2015
IN THE QUIET SLEEPY VILLAGE
13 Sunday Sep 2015
Posted in Fiction, Humor, song parody, Writings
Tags
In the quiet sleepy village,
Where the Romans came to pillage,
All the young men once so brave they ran away,
Only old folks mean and grumpy,
And young maidens fat and lumpy,
Made their minds up, “In this village we shall stay,
Yes right here in this village we shall stay!”
At first the Romans they were contented,
Yes their resolve it was unrelented,
As they sacked and divvied up all that they did find,
But then soon they were surrounded,
By old folks and maidens rounded,
A-G-G-G-H!….and so they too,
They left that village far behind,
Yes they also left that village far behind!
Now that made both the old folk and the maiden,
Feel so disappointed and unladen,
For they almost had men fearless and built strong,
Then soon the ruthless Huns and Vandals,
And the mighty Mongols in their sandals,
They also fled that place without a song,
Yes they too fled that place without a song!
You see, in that noiseless town of slumber,
Where the Romans came to plunder,
Not even one invading marauder stood a hoot,
So go away Julius Caesar,
Don’t come a callin’ Genghis either,
Just stay home…. forget adventure and all that loot,
Or once again you’ll find your sorry selves hot to scoot,
Yes all over you’ll find your sorry selves hot to scoot!
by John Patrick Seekamp (January 15th, 2015)
THE PERSISTENT INVENTOR
14 Friday Mar 2014
Tags
The Scientific Log Of Phillibert P. Phiffleflute the third
Entry for Monday, July 7th, 1884———Day 1:
Prepared laboratory for experiment.
Mixed 7 granules of magnesium dioxide with 4 granules of potassium sulfate———-Nothing.
Disposed of chemicals, cleaned equipment, returned home.
Entry for Tuesday, July 8th, 1884———Day 2:
Prepared laboratory for experiment.
Mixed 9 granules of manganese chloride with 6 granules of sodium nitrate———-Nothing.
Disposed of chemicals, cleaned equipment, returned home.
Entry for Wednesday, July 9th, 1884———Day 3:
Prepared laboratory for experiment.
Mixed 5 granules of carbon silicate with 2 granules of sulfur chlorite———Nothing.
Disposed of chemicals, cleaned equipment, returned home.
Entry for Thursday, July 10th, 1884———Day 4:
Prepared laboratory for experiment.
Mixed 1 granule of ammonium hydrate with 9 granules of hydrogen ammoniate———–Nothing.
Disposed of chemicals, cleaned equipment, returned home.
Entry for Friday, July 11th, 1884———Day 5:
Prepared laboratory for experiment.
Mixed 3 granules of aluminum silicate with 10 granules of silver hydroselenide———-Nothing.
Disposed of chemicals, cleaned equipment, returned home.
Entry for Saturday, July 12th, 1884———Day 6:
Felt frustrated. needed to relax. Mixed 1 teaspoon chamomile tea (in ball) with 1 cup hydrogen monoxide heated to 100 degrees Celsius , left it to steep———Ah, felt better.
Prepared laboratory for experiment.
Mixed 3 granules of ferric acetate with 2 granules of titanium dioxide———Nothing!
Became frustrated again, needed to relax, thought of better idea——–mixed 1 oz. of French brandy with 1 cup of hydrogen monoxide heated to 100 degrees Celsius———felt even better!
Mixed 12 granules of sodium nitrate with 11 granules of sodium nitrate——–Nothing. Ahgggg!
Frustration!
Mixed 2 parts French brandy with 2 cubes hydrogen monoxide cooled to 0 degrees Celsius, felt okay——-then continued.
Mixed 25 different granules of some sort with 32 granules of ammonium whatever—–uhhhh! A puff!
All this work is making me thirsty——-mixed 3 parts French brandy in a glass with a teaspoon of hydrogen monoxide, not heated at all——-back to work.
Mixed 56 parts ammonium something with—-ah—–whatever that fluffy stuff was—–ah, let’s see, oh yes—-43 parts of it anyway———Bang! Whoa! That was certainly loud! Must celebrate!
Mixed 3 parts Frenchy with—–with—-3 parts Frenchy and drank it all up. There! Now where was I? Oh–oh, I remember now. I was trying to make something. Okay. Okay.
I mixed up several—several handfuls of some sort with several handfuls of some sort and then——-where am I——why is everything so dreadfully white———-And say—-why do all the folks around here look like they’re floating——say—–now I remember. I DID IT!——-I ACTUALLY MADE SOMETHING THAT WORKED. JUMPING JOHOSAPHATS! Like my good ol’ grandpappy used to say, ‘Be persistent. Never give up. If you quit you’re finished!’ There—–I persisted. I didn’t give up. BUT BOY AM I FINISHED!!!!
____________________________________by John Patrick Seekamp, 2014
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